Looking Back to She Speaks 2009

I originally posted this in August of 2009, after my first She Speaks conference:

Did you ever need to describe something and couldn't find a word big enough? Fun, inspiring, educational, amazing...I could go on and on. I prayed before I left that I wouldn't just learn to "do ministry" better. I am fairly organized and efficient on my own strength, but I am tired of doing things on my own strength. That just leads to burn-out. I wanted to go and really meet the Lord, to be all consumed with a passion for Him and what He has for me. And that, friends, is what happened.

From the very first session, the focus was on Him. There were technical aspects in each talk, but the out-loud, up-front focus was Christ. If we are not relying on Him and using the gifts He gave us, acknowledging Him as the driving force of all we do, we are not doing it to glorify Him. The minute I decide that if I stopped showing up a ministry would cease or fall into trouble, I need to walk away and get on my knees. God does not need any of us to accomplish His purposes, but He allows us to take part in His awesome story. Definitely humbling to be reminded of this.

I was also reminded that if God has an agenda, nothing will get in its way. You know the song "The Waiting Is the Hardest Part"? It's true. Sometimes I feel like God is calling me to something, but I'm not sure what it is or how to get there. If He has a plan, which He does for each of us (Ephesians 2:10), we need to keep doing the things we are supposed to do.

• Study the Word.
• Be a prayer warrior.
• Love and serve others.
• Stay on the path we know we are supposed to be on, and it will lead us to His purpopse and plan for us.

I always worry that if I'm not intensely trying to make something happen, to force His hand, that I might miss His call for me. It doesn't work that way. That puts the power on me, and that isn't where it belongs.

The point was also made this weekend, which I am very, very familiar with, that when we are about Kingdom Business, anything done to glorify God, the enemy is watching. Waiting. Whispering. Reminding you that you aren't good enough or smart enough to do something. Telling you that your past disqualifies you from your future. Because of the blood of Christ, this is not true. Read it again: This is not true.

The last biggest thing that I will take with me after this weekend is to live the story God has given me. He has allowed my particular circumstances and mistakes for a reason. Don't cover up certain things, because that doesn't glorify God. He hasn't asked us to be His reporters, speaking generically about what He can do in a life, but to be His witnesses, telling of the transformation He has made in our lives.

If, now that you "have arrived" and have your Super Christian ID card, you are ignoring certain parts of your past, stop. Remember, God is sovereign. He could have stepped in and steered you in another choice than the ones you made, but He didn't. If God allows it, He can use it. Takes guts, and it's scary, but entrust it all to God. Covering up denies His power. This is really enough fodder for a whole new post, so I will close now.

Suffice it to say that God is in control. We belong to Him. He will accomplish His purposes through us, not because He needs us, but because He loves us. Live the life He has called you to. Stop looking at everyone else's race, or you will trip running your own. I could go on, because my heart is so full, but let me close with this: If you do not know the Lord, I would love to help you meet Him. He has a plan for you, and is waiting for you. I am not any more or less special in His eyes than anyone else. We are all prescious in His sight. If you have questions, I would love to help you find the answers.