Selfish

Life has been busy lately, full of good, godly activities. But why does that sometimes leave me feeling sad, smug, and alone in my house? I think I've stumbled onto a different kind of selfish. I could spend every day of my life doing good things for God, but if I have alienated my family or judged their leisure activities as less than worthy, I am not doing anyone any favors. I am even doing harm to myself and to those around me. When I get bent out of shape because my husband finds more pleasure in watching SciFi all weekend instead of doing things I deem more worthy, I am disrespecting him.

I have put some things on the back burner, like training for a run I really wanted to do. Pick your fights, I always say, when it comes to parenting. I have had to take my own advice. Even though all the things I would like to do are extremely worthy in my eyes, God wants my heart above all else. And if my heart is full of myself, it won't be full of Him. So, once again, I am praying for humility, which is kind of like praying for patience. You never know how God will provide that lesson...stay tuned.

"Whoever wants to be first must be last of all and servant of all." Mark 9:35